And we hate you!

I’m forcing myself to post, not sure why I’m not into it, but seeing as how this is my first post in almost 6 months, and nobody remembers me anyway, maybe it’s past its time.  My life seems very uneventful, and I don’t have much to say.  I’m learning to maintain my weight loss, which is not as fun or interesting as losing it.  Hardly anybody even remembers that I used to be fat, only a few people at my job knew me then, and my friends are over it.  I’d still like to lose 10-15 more, but this seems to be the case often with POW (previously obese women), especially past 40, like me.

Seems to be a lot of trial and error, a constant vigilance against regain, which I will start to do if I slack too much.  I can slack a little.  Maybe the successful maintainers can learn how much and how often they can slack, how many exceptions, special occasions, what-have-you, they can get away with without regaining.  And how not to start increasing portion sizes, or snacking, all sorts of things that all most be monitored, however loosely or uptightly that needs to be for the particular person.

As for the title of this post, a friend of a friend said it to me at a party.  A few of them were sitting around talking about how they were twenty pounds up from their fighting weights, unlike the previous year at this same pool party.  I had honestly never thought about normal-weight women and weight cycling, more used to 50+ pound swings.  Who knew, 10-20 pound swings, on women that barely dip into overweight even at high weights.  One of them says “Oh, by the way, Julie, you look really good!  You can totally tell that you work out, unlike us these days.  And we hate you!  :-)”   All of these reactions had been going though my head, such as “but I’m still fat!”, or “better be, I spend half my life in the gym”, and finally “thanks”, but I didn’t know how to react to the hate comment.   Since I had eaten a very medicated brownie, I decided I wasn’t obligated to respond at all, and didn’t.

I guess I’m glad that somebody who actually saw me in a bathing suit thinks I look like I go to the gym, though I’m not quite sure how to feel about this compliment, but I’m learning that the gym isn’t useful, in terms of functional fitness.   I played softball (for the first time in 20 years?) tonight with my work team, and I can’t sprint, as in run for the ball.  I can, but it feels awkward, and I’m not used to it.  I can’t throw the ball very far.  WTF have I been training for in the gym?  Maybe i should find a soccer team as well.

While most of the country is scorching, we are having a chilly summer.  Today, even the areas normally hot were 20F below average.  The pool party I mentioned above, last year was low-90s, this year mid-70s.  Even places that usually are much warmer only get there sometimes.  As for where i live, which is considered a marine layer, has been given an adjective, exuberant.  I now live in an exuberant (or was that exaggerated) marine layer.  This is my coldest summer that I remember.

Random sight on my walk home, had to look twice